The Teachable Moments Of Mildred Beaubrun's Death
If you have not be following the tragic story of Orlando resident Mildred Beaubrun, then please check these links at Symphony's blog, Essential Presence to become familiar with the back story.
Everyone should be mourning the inexplicable and senseless murder of a young woman who celebrated her final birthday dying in a hospital room. A young woman who will forever be a teenager, never an adult woman.
Yet, while we mourn, we need to start paying attention and taking action. Mildred Beaubrun was not the first to suffer this kind of pointless violence and she will not be the last, if we do not admit to ourselves and to the public that black women and girls are just not safe in our society. Black women and girls are overlooked and devalued victims of violent crime everyday, every year. Instead of becoming angry, frustrated, whining or lamenting that unfortunate status, we must become protective and proactive for one another.
In my view, Mildred Beaubrun should still be alive. She would still be alive if black women in large numbers had paid attention and took action about the equally senseless murder of Sakia Gunn in 2003. Sakia Gunn was murdered o n Mother's Day in eerily similar circumstances to Ms. Beaubrun. While her home state of New Jersey staged a vocal outcry, the rest of the world failed to take notice. Too many black women and girls still have never heard of Sakia Gunn and that is a shame. A documentary is being made about her life and murder, please visit the site here.
We can mourn and save lives at the same time. I have yet to read any information to help black women and girls protect themselves from violent verbal assaults, physical abuse, sexual assault, and life-threatening violence. Where is the black equivalent of the organization, Girls Fight Back? And if we don't have one, we need to contact Girls Fight Back and start a partnership to help get their self-defense training program to become more available to black women and girls. I can vouch for the effectiveness of their program. They provide basic commonsense ideals that may just save you from being hurt or murdered.
Very few women have ever been in a physical altercation, it's what makes us perfect victims. If you have never been grabbed or struck, resulting in intense physical pain, your mind is thinking "I'm hurt" or "I've been struck" instead of "I have to get away" or I need to fight back." By the time the thought of self-defense kicks in, a woman is already often times in an indefensible position to escape harm.
I can't tell you how many adult and young black women I see skipping down the street yapping on a cellphone or zonked out with an I-Pod at its highest volume, completely indifferent to their surroundings and the people around them. Do you know what you are saying to a potential predator - Hi! Make me a victim!
I have a dumb ass black colleague who always refuses rides home from the local watering hole that all the young faculty and staff hangs out at it. She thinks that "pretending" to talk on her cellphone while walking the three blocks to her home is safe. WTF? I always look at her wonder if they put adults on milk cartons.
You never engage in an altercation with a stranger. Never! You really don't know who is crazy or how crazy they actually may be. That was part of the tragic mistake made the nights Sakia Gunn and Mildred Beaubrun died. And I am not blaming the victims here. It is a natural and human reaction to respond to insults and threats, but a knife or gun and some cowardly individuals desire to use those weapons, escalates a verbal dispute to a life-ending tragedy.
A woman has the right to be angry and offended when approached in a negative and threatening manner, but we need to understand the stakes are high.
